The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger
Unger Games

Winnipeg Jets Plan to Lose Every Game Until Hellebuyck Comes Back

November 30, 2025

WINNIPEG, MB Despite a slight hiccup in the plan last night, the Winnipeg Jets are hoping to get back on track and lose every game from now until whenever Connor Hellebuyck comes back. “I’m really […]

Unger Games

McGill Cuts Beloved Crokinole Team

November 28, 2025

MONTREAL, QC McGill University has freed up more than $6 billion in budget space after cutting the beloved but expensive crokinole team. “Players kept flicking the pieces all over the place and losing them,” said […]

Unger Conviction

  • Disney Releases New Song: ‘We Don’t Talk About Menno’
    April 12, 2022
  • Mennonites Collect Hundreds of Empty Shoe Boxes to Send Overseas
    October 23, 2016
  • Local Church Adds Cake-Baking to List of Holy Sacraments
    June 6, 2018

Unger & Thirst

  • Farmer Sausage-Scented Air Fresheners a Big Hit in Mennonite Country
    June 7, 2017
  • “How do they get the cottage cheese in the vereniki?”: Mennonite Man Unlocks the Vereniki Secret
    October 26, 2021
  • Death Row Inmate Requests Mennonite Food for Last Meal
    October 26, 2017

Unger the Influence

  • A Complete List of Jokes that Won’t Get You Cancelled These Days
    September 18, 2025
  • Carney Enlists the Amish to Address Canada’s Housing Crisis
    September 14, 2025
  • Doug Ford Dumps Out Entire Crown Royal Bag Full of Scrabble Tiles
    September 3, 2025

The Daily Bonnet

  • Upcoming Hurricanes To Be Given Mennonite Names
    September 6, 2017
  • Christian Movie Shatters Box Office Record in Steinbach
    September 22, 2018
  • Mennonite Rundschau Names Taylor Swift ‘Person of the Year’
    December 11, 2023
  • Mennonite Man Discovers Suspenders Are No Good for Bungee Jumping
    May 15, 2017

Trending

  • Mennonite Woman Concerned She Might Be Anglican
    November 21, 2025
  • Winnipeg Couple Embark on Arduous High-Altitude Expedition to Second Balcony of Burton Cummings Theatre
    November 20, 2025
  • Dating Couple to Spend Romantic Evening Basking in the Aroma of the Maple Leaf Plant
    November 18, 2025
  • Mennonite Families Sign-Up to Bring Salads, Buns, and Measles to Upcoming Potluck
    November 17, 2025

Unger Suspicion

  • Massive Concrete Wall Divides Kitchener and Waterloo
    September 19, 2017
  • Mennonite College Students Crash ChatGPT by Requesting Too Many Hauerwas Essays All at Once
    February 7, 2023
  • Area Woman to Spend Entire Summer Posting Pictures of Her Feet
    July 14, 2024
  • Mennonites Demand Release of the Epsteinbach Files
    November 27, 2025
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

Mennonites Demand Release of the Epsteinbach Files

November 27, 2025

Lack of Snow Deludes Winnipeg Man Into Thinking He Doesn’t Need a Parka

November 26, 2025

Local Dad Gets Full Time Job Carting His Kids Around to Sports

November 25, 2025

Chaos Erupts in Church After Pastor Calls for Hymn 67

November 23, 2025

Mennonite Man Opens Southern Manitoba’s Largest Aura Farm

November 22, 2025

Unger Games

  • Winnipeg Jets Plan to Lose Every Game Until Hellebuyck Comes Back
    November 30, 2025
  • McGill Cuts Beloved Crokinole Team
    November 28, 2025
  • Local Dad Gets Full Time Job Carting His Kids Around to Sports
    November 25, 2025
  • Winnipeg Man to Host Grey Cup Party and Cheer for Nobody
    November 16, 2025
  • 20-Knipser Pileup Just Outside Blumenort
    November 9, 2025

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2025 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved