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Unger & Thirst

Alberta Man Votes to Stay in Canada After Discovering Honey Dill Sauce

June 15, 2026

TABER, AB Area man Gary Froese, 51, has undergone a radical change in heart about Alberta separatism after a trip to a family funeral in Manitoba this week. “We had the raisin buns and cheese […]

Unger Suspicion

Musk Tries Desperately to Squeeze Camel Through Eye of This Needle

June 14, 2026

STARBASE, TX Hours after becoming the world’s first trillionaire, Elon Musk was spotted desperately trying to squeeze his pet camel Jacob through the eye of Mrs. Siemens’s sewing needle. “I’m putting all my top engineers […]

Unger Conviction

  • Mennonite Pastors Release New ‘Tracing App’ that Tracks How Much Time You’ve Spent Reading the Bible
    May 30, 2020
  • Carney’s Speech Rated Just 2% More Exciting than Mennonite Pastor’s Sermon
    March 20, 2025
  • Goldmine of Discarded Gospel Records Discovered at Local Thrift Store
    July 28, 2019

Unger & Thirst

  • Chihuahua Faspa Cancelled After Oma Runs Out of Queso Menonita
    August 29, 2020
  • Mennonite Woman Feeds Entire Family for a Week on One Little Caesars Pizza
    March 11, 2024
  • Pigeon With Backpack Full of Knackzoat Caught at BC Prison
    January 10, 2023

Unger the Influence

  • James Comey Indicted Over ‘606 47’ Seashell Photo
    May 3, 2026
  • Hog Farmers Concerned as Manitoba Seeks to Ban AI
    May 2, 2026
  • Doug Ford to Exclusively Travel by Horse and Buggy from Now On
    April 19, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Mennonite Newlyweds Already Planning their Upcoming Baby Shower
    November 29, 2021
  • Strange and/or Creepy Google Search Words That Led People to the Daily Bonnet
    May 18, 2017
  • Vinyl Outsells CDs at MCC Store for the First Time Since 1987
    March 29, 2023
  • Mennonites Gather in Winnipeg to Decide which Writer to Excommunicate Next
    June 12, 2025

Trending

  • Mennonite Church to Host UFC Fight
    June 7, 2026
  • Road Crews Really Busy This Summer Putting Out Pylons
    June 6, 2026
  • Mennonite Man Installs New Inground Pool
    June 4, 2026
  • Adventurous Manitoban Drives Right to the Top of Province’s Highest Mountain
    June 3, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Counting Crows Launch New Fragrance ‘The Smell of Hospitals in Winter’
    December 27, 2023
  • World’s “Most Powerful Nation” Loses Yet Another War
    August 17, 2021
  • Seniors Start New Baby Boom to Overtake Millennials
    February 21, 2024
  • Stash of Spare Prince Harry Books Donated to Local Thrift Store
    January 14, 2023
  • Facebook
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Mennonite Man with Million-dollar Tractor Stakes a Stand Against “Pride”

June 13, 2026

Conflict-Averse Mennonites Getting Really Into Soccer to Watch All the Ties

June 12, 2026

Every Self-Respecting Mennonite Cheering for Paraguay in World Cup Opener Friday

June 11, 2026

Ottawa to Ban Social Media for Kids and Replace it with Hinterland Who’s Who

June 10, 2026

Mennonite Man Super Excited to Eat These Noah’s Ark Cookies

June 9, 2026

Unger Games

  • Conflict-Averse Mennonites Getting Really Into Soccer to Watch All the Ties
    June 12, 2026
  • Every Self-Respecting Mennonite Cheering for Paraguay in World Cup Opener Friday
    June 11, 2026
  • Mennonite Church to Host UFC Fight
    June 7, 2026
  • Enhanced Games Allow Athletes to Use Summa Borscht
    May 28, 2026
  • Winnipeg Metro Region Hoists Centennial Cup
    May 18, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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