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Unger Suspicion

Angine de Poitrine Turn Out to be a Couple Mennonite Boys from Winkler

April 15, 2026

WINKLER, MB Angine de Poitrine, the mysterious math rock duo who has taken the Internet by storm, have kept their identities secret until now. The secret slipped this week out after the drummer was caught […]

Unger the Influence

Conservatives Form Majority Government

April 14, 2026

OTTAWA, ON After a barrage of floor crossing and a couple by-elections this week, Mark Carney and the Conservative Party of Canada have finally formed a majority government. “Canadians have spoken loud and clear—they want […]

Unger Conviction

  • Study Reveals 70% of Mennonites Don’t Know All the Dance Moves to Hymn 606
    November 11, 2018
  • ‘What Church Do You Go To?’ Declared Official Steinbach Greeting
    December 20, 2017
  • Bible Camp Shuts Down After No One Memorizes Enough Verses to Attend
    July 2, 2019

Unger & Thirst

  • New Study: Farmer Sausage Contains Only “Trace Amounts” of Actual Farmers
    March 10, 2021
  • Thieves Steal ‘Mennonite Crown Jewels’ in Brazen Daytime Heist
    October 20, 2025
  • Mennonite Man Blows Entire Co-op Dividend Cheque on Chicken Chef Feast
    June 4, 2020

Unger the Influence

  • White House Demands New Bridge Be Rerouted to Epstein Island
    February 11, 2026
  • George Washington Completely “Absolved” in New Epstein Files
    February 1, 2026
  • Premiers Gather in Saskatoon for Annual Crokinole Tournament
    January 29, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Kinky Mennonite Couple to Try 606ing Tonight
    October 5, 2022
  • Mennonite Man is Just About Ready to Start His Christmas Shopping
    December 23, 2023
  • New Logo Means Andrew Unger is Stuck with these Glasses
    April 10, 2023
  • Area Resident Becomes First Mennonite Man Ever to Tell His Wife He Loves Her
    October 14, 2022

Trending

  • Mennonite Man Sent To Unclog Space Toilet
    April 7, 2026
  • Family Manages to Get On a Record Three Rides During Weeklong Trip to Disney
    April 6, 2026
  • Taber Arena Will No Longer Be Flooded With Schmaunt Fat After Winning Kraft Hockeyville
    April 5, 2026
  • Peters “Makes It to First Base” Giving Hope to Young Men Across Winkler
    April 4, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Famed Novelist John Steinbach to Release New Novel ‘Of Mice and Menno’
    February 11, 2021
  • WestJet Accidentally Announces New Direct Flights from Winnipeg to Altona
    May 13, 2023
  • Mennonite Couple Spends Delightful Holiday Weekend on Toronto Tarmac
    December 28, 2022
  • United States Signs $110 Billion Weapons Deal with Random Guy on eBay
    May 25, 2017
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“I thought it was me as a trajchtmoaka,” Trump says

April 13, 2026

Mennonite Man Wears His Very Best Carhartt to Church

April 12, 2026

Americans Demand the Flooding of Saskatchewan and Manitoba to Give their Ships Easier Access to Canadian Oil

April 11, 2026

Thousands of Poultry Farmers Accidentally Show Up at ‘National Poetry Month’ Event

April 10, 2026

Killing People Only Way to Achieve Lasting Peace, Leaders Insist

April 8, 2026

Unger Games

  • Taber Arena Will No Longer Be Flooded With Schmaunt Fat After Winning Kraft Hockeyville
    April 5, 2026
  • Peters “Makes It to First Base” Giving Hope to Young Men Across Winkler
    April 4, 2026
  • Jason Kelce Spotted on Manitoba Farm in Full Mennonite Attire
    March 11, 2026
  • American Victory Part of Chinese Government Plot to Get Canadians to Quit Playing Hockey
    February 26, 2026
  • Trump to Award Connor Helleybuyck Nation’s Highest Honour: The Undisputed Champion of Beautiful Clean Coal
    February 25, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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