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Unger Suspicion

Thousands of Canadians Flock to Mexico to Cool Off this Summer

July 13, 2026

CUAUHTEMOC, MEXICO Thousands of Canadians have decided to vacation in Mexico this summer to escape the oppressive heat of Canada. “Ahhh, it’ll be so nice to get out of Winnipeg for once during the summer […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Women are Shedding their Düaks During Heat Wave

July 12, 2026

STEINBACH, MB Thousands of Mennonite woman descended AD Penner Park this afternoon to watch the local EMMC-EMC-MC slo-pitch tournament, but soon found they had to make a few adjustment to their attire. “Oba, I’ve experienced […]

Unger Conviction

  • Mennonite Pastor Enters Sanctuary Hidden in a Broom Cart
    June 28, 2023
  • Mennonite Man Pays Tithe in Chickens
    January 26, 2017
  • What Happens if We Use Google Translate on Our Favourite Mennonite Hymns?
    March 1, 2020

Unger & Thirst

  • Mennonite Men to Hold Bi-Weekly Schnettje-Konferenz on the Corner of Main and Reimer
    December 14, 2019
  • Delicious Rhubarb Platz Found in Sarah Polley’s Oscar Gift Bag
    March 13, 2023
  • Mennonite Woman Refuses to Pay for Superstore Bags
    June 29, 2017

Unger the Influence

  • Webster’s Dictionary Redefines “Ceasefire” as “Active Battle”
    May 8, 2026
  • Man Who Aced Cognitive Test Can’t Tell Jesus From a Doctor
    May 5, 2026
  • James Comey Indicted Over ‘606 47’ Seashell Photo
    May 3, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Joel Wiens Stadium Replaces Reimer Stadium (Yes, this is real and, no, it’s not in Manitoba)
    February 15, 2021
  • Fact Check: Do Hex Signs on Pennsylvania Dutch Barns Mean the Owners are Swingers?
    May 6, 2021
  • Last Remaining Man at Senior’s Home Has Women Scrambling for His Attention
    January 16, 2019
  • Mennonite Population Completely Unaffected by Global Cyberattack
    May 15, 2017

Trending

  • FIFA Agrees to Let Trump Officiate Tonight’s World Cup Match
    July 6, 2026
  • Canada Loses to Morocco After Not Getting Enough Pucks to the Net
    July 5, 2026
  • Surprises Abound on Taylor and Travis’s Guest List
    July 4, 2026
  • Area Man Spends 10 Hours Trying to Figure Out Hotel Shower Controls
    July 3, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • U.S. Capitol to Be Replaced with One Massive Banana Republic
    January 7, 2021
  • Public Uproar As Thousands of Refugees Descend on Western Canada
    February 22, 2017
  • Canadian Tire Introduces New ‘Brooks, Alberta’ Scented Air Fresheners
    August 21, 2025
  • Mennonite Man Confesses to Voting Democrat
    December 10, 2020
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White Sox to Feature All-Mennonite Starting Lineup

July 11, 2026

Soccer Player Gets Red Card for Yawning

July 10, 2026

Mennonites Gather at Bird’s Hill for Annual Winnipeg Falk Fest

July 9, 2026

World Cup Tourists Fall in Love With Schmaunt Fat

July 8, 2026

Mennonite Woman Struggles to Keep Dandelions, Quackgrass, and AI Data Centres Out of Her Garden This Year

July 7, 2026

Unger Games

  • White Sox to Feature All-Mennonite Starting Lineup
    July 11, 2026
  • Soccer Player Gets Red Card for Yawning
    July 10, 2026
  • FIFA Agrees to Let Trump Officiate Tonight’s World Cup Match
    July 6, 2026
  • Canada Loses to Morocco After Not Getting Enough Pucks to the Net
    July 5, 2026
  • Paraguay Defeats Germany Thanks to the Prayers of 100,000 Mennonites
    June 30, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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