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Unger & Thirst

Server Stops By to Ask if Everything’s Tasting Good So Far Just as Area Man Takes Final Bite

April 20, 2026

ARBORG, MB Area man Dan Wiens was just about finished his meatloaf and mashed potatoes this evening when the server finally popped by to see how the first few bites tasted. “Umm, it was good,” […]

Unger the Influence

Doug Ford to Exclusively Travel by Horse and Buggy from Now On

April 19, 2026

NEW HAMBURG, ON Days after it was discovered the Ontario Premier was getting around in a $28 million private jet, Doug Ford announced he would be getting a Martin or Eby to cart him around […]

Unger Conviction

  • Pourer Gets Dunked Just to Make Sure
    June 1, 2020
  • Mennonite Man Celebrates 500 Years of Anabaptism By Getting Baptized 500 Times
    January 20, 2025
  • Craft Beer Snob Ruins Church Men’s Fishing Weekend By Bringing Nothing But Really Bitter IPAs
    June 28, 2019

Unger & Thirst

  • Man Disguised as Mennonite Woman Smears Schmaunt Fat on Mona Lisa
    May 31, 2022
  • Winkler Supermarket Starts Selling Liquor to Convince Mennonites to Cover Their Faces
    January 20, 2022
  • New ‘Import Store’ to Sell Bland Canadian Food in Mexico
    November 29, 2023

Unger the Influence

  • James Talarico Article Pulled from the Unger Review
    February 19, 2026
  • White House Demands New Bridge Be Rerouted to Epstein Island
    February 11, 2026
  • George Washington Completely “Absolved” in New Epstein Files
    February 1, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Bottomless Pepsi Promotion Bankrupts Local Restaurant
    May 1, 2017
  • Mennonite Man Convinced He Has a 50% Chance of Winning 50/50 Draw
    August 7, 2021
  • B.C. Relatives are Really Proud of Their Inability to Survive Harsh Manitoba Winters
    December 6, 2016
  • ‘Sheeple’ Farm Opens in Southern Manitoba
    October 23, 2020

Trending

  • Americans Demand the Flooding of Saskatchewan and Manitoba to Give their Ships Easier Access to Canadian Oil
    April 11, 2026
  • Thousands of Poultry Farmers Accidentally Show Up at ‘National Poetry Month’ Event
    April 10, 2026
  • Killing People Only Way to Achieve Lasting Peace, Leaders Insist
    April 8, 2026
  • Mennonite Man Sent To Unclog Space Toilet
    April 7, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Local Man Signals His Own Virtue By Calling Out Virtue Signalling
    June 11, 2020
  • Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez a Big Hit on Hutterite Colony
    February 18, 2019
  • Icelandic Mennonites Experiment with 8 Day Work Week
    July 14, 2021
  • Bitcoin Adopts Catchy New Slogan
    May 17, 2022
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Fans Petition Rock and Roll Hall of Fame to Induct Paraguayan Harpist Eduard Klassen

April 18, 2026

Angine de Poitrine Turn Out to be a Couple Mennonite Boys from Winkler

April 15, 2026

Conservatives Form Majority Government

April 14, 2026

“I thought it was me as a trajchtmoaka,” Trump says

April 13, 2026

Mennonite Man Wears His Very Best Carhartt to Church

April 12, 2026

Unger Games

  • Taber Arena Will No Longer Be Flooded With Schmaunt Fat After Winning Kraft Hockeyville
    April 5, 2026
  • Peters “Makes It to First Base” Giving Hope to Young Men Across Winkler
    April 4, 2026
  • Jason Kelce Spotted on Manitoba Farm in Full Mennonite Attire
    March 11, 2026
  • American Victory Part of Chinese Government Plot to Get Canadians to Quit Playing Hockey
    February 26, 2026
  • Trump to Award Connor Helleybuyck Nation’s Highest Honour: The Undisputed Champion of Beautiful Clean Coal
    February 25, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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