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The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Installs New Inground Pool

June 4, 2026

GOSHEN, IN Local man Johan Miller has always wanted a good quality inground pool, which he feels will be especially refreshing during the hot summer months. “But I wasn’t going to pay Home Depot prices,” […]

Unger Suspicion

Adventurous Manitoban Drives Right to the Top of Province’s Highest Mountain

June 3, 2026

BALDY MOUNTAIN, MB Area man Pete Rempel braved a completely paved highway this week and became the first member of his immediate family to drive right to the top of Manitoba’s highest mountain. “It’s a […]

Unger Conviction

  • Dual Headstone Eagerly Awaits Death of Spouse
    August 23, 2025
  • Military Called In to Prevent Mennonite Woman from Getting Behind the Pulpit
    June 28, 2018
  • Mennonite Man Baptized a Third Time Just to Make Sure
    July 15, 2016

Unger & Thirst

  • Steinbach Finally Gets an Authentic Mexican Restaurant
    September 24, 2024
  • Winkler Declares Schmaunt Fat Rationing Emergency
    July 28, 2021
  • Mennonites Compete to See Who Can Cook the Blandest Least Spicy Chili
    July 22, 2018

Unger the Influence

  • James Comey Indicted Over ‘606 47’ Seashell Photo
    May 3, 2026
  • Hog Farmers Concerned as Manitoba Seeks to Ban AI
    May 2, 2026
  • Doug Ford to Exclusively Travel by Horse and Buggy from Now On
    April 19, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Early Results Show Mennonite Pastor in Commanding Lead
    November 8, 2016
  • Mennonite Woman to Dust Entire Province of Manitoba
    May 15, 2026
  • Mennonite Rock Band Releases All-Cowbell Version of ‘Don’t Fear the Reaper’
    July 2, 2021
  • A Book Review Yet – Miriam Toews: ‘A Truce That Is Not Peace’
    August 28, 2025

Trending

  • Carney to Raze 72 Million Acres of Old Growth Forest to Make Copies of Guilbeault’s Resignation Letter
    May 27, 2026
  • Petro-Canada Introduces New Farmer Sausage-Scented Air Fresheners
    May 26, 2026
  • Andrew Unger Celebrates 10 Years of Schmaunt Fat Jokes
    May 25, 2026
  • Ed Sullivan Theatre to Be Demolished and Replaced with Donald J. Trump Center for Free Speech
    May 22, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • 7 Rock Songs We Should Sing in Church
    November 28, 2017
  • Doug Ford Vows to Downsize Mennonite Elder Boards
    September 12, 2018
  • Falling on Your Ass Only Known Way to Stop While Skating
    February 7, 2018
  • NASA Confirms the Existence of Mennonites on Other Planets
    November 24, 2016
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Mennonite Woman Creates Her Own Rhubarb-Flavoured Bubly

June 2, 2026

Trump Calls Andrew Unger “Untalented, Totally Not Funny,” Demands Cancellation of The Unger Review

May 31, 2026

Trump to “Completely Destroy” Military He “Completely Destroyed” Last Week

May 30, 2026

Carney Just One MP Resignation Away From Minority Government the People Voted For

May 29, 2026

Enhanced Games Allow Athletes to Use Summa Borscht

May 28, 2026

Unger Games

  • Enhanced Games Allow Athletes to Use Summa Borscht
    May 28, 2026
  • Winnipeg Metro Region Hoists Centennial Cup
    May 18, 2026
  • Donald Trump Tells Iran He Holds All the Cards
    May 13, 2026
  • Tariffs Move Leafs’ Pick from First to Sixty-Seventh
    May 6, 2026
  • Taber Arena Will No Longer Be Flooded With Schmaunt Fat After Winning Kraft Hockeyville
    April 5, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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