The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger
The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman to Dust Entire Province of Manitoba

May 15, 2026

CARMAN, MB Mrs. Loewen of Carman has been enlisted by Manitoba Premier Wab Kinew to dust the entire province this weekend. “That was quite the dust storm,” said Kinew. “But luckily we have women like […]

Unger Games

Donald Trump Tells Iran He Holds All the Cards

May 13, 2026

WASHINGTON, DC In his most emphatic statement to date, US President Donald Trump has told Iranian authorities to give up because he holds all the Dutch Blitz cards. “I’ve got all the cards. All the […]

Unger Conviction

  • Mennonite Pastor Schedules Mandatory Church Meeting During Game 7
    June 22, 2024
  • Mennonite Man Accidentally Speaks Plautdietsch on a Sunday
    May 30, 2021
  • Church Basement Chair Recruited To Help Change Lightbulb
    August 16, 2024

Unger & Thirst

  • Popular Mennonite Cookbook Updated for Millennials: ‘The Less-with-More Cookbook’
    January 26, 2021
  • Mrs. Janzen’s Day Old Buns a Big Hit with Frugal Mennonites
    June 7, 2020
  • Manitoba Man Survives Encounter with Out-of-Province Farmer Sausage
    July 12, 2022

Unger the Influence

  • Mennonites Hired to Drain the Strait of Hormuz
    March 17, 2026
  • Conservatives Vote to Reaffirm Party Leader Mark Carney
    March 6, 2026
  • Funk and Penner Endorse Penner for Goertzen’s Job Reports Peters from Reimer
    March 1, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Meet the Man Your Mom Wanted You to Marry
    November 16, 2016
  • Grandkids Horrified as Grandma Reimer Texts “I’m Mennonite AF”
    June 5, 2020
  • Aritzia Introduces New Line of Long Denim Skirts for Women Wanting to Look Like They’re in Some Weird Religious Sect
    April 18, 2024
  • What Are the 150 Most Significant Moments in Canadian Mennonite History?
    June 30, 2017

Trending

  • Tariffs Move Leafs’ Pick from First to Sixty-Seventh
    May 6, 2026
  • Man Who Aced Cognitive Test Can’t Tell Jesus From a Doctor
    May 5, 2026
  • Mennonite Man Finally Takes Off His Winter Tires
    May 4, 2026
  • James Comey Indicted Over ‘606 47’ Seashell Photo
    May 3, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Local Man Signals His Own Virtue By Calling Out Virtue Signalling
    June 11, 2020
  • CBC Bans Popular Plautdietsch Christmas Song ‘Frü, Daut es Kold Büte!’
    December 12, 2018
  • Generous Jeff Bezos Donates Two Thimbles and a Couple Spools of Thread to Mennonite Quilt Charity
    January 19, 2020
  • Mennonites Rejoice as NHL Finally Bans Military Appreciation Jerseys
    June 24, 2023
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

90-Year-Old Grandma Emerges Victorious in Senior Assassin 2026

May 12, 2026

Mennonite Man Sets Record for Tallest Bowl at Mongo’s Grill

May 10, 2026

Nationwide Cottage Cheese Shortage Causes Mennonites to Compromise Cherished Values for First Time Ever

May 9, 2026

Webster’s Dictionary Redefines “Ceasefire” as “Active Battle”

May 8, 2026

Mennonite Man Doesn’t Have Enough Space on Census Form to List All His Kids

May 7, 2026

Unger Games

  • Donald Trump Tells Iran He Holds All the Cards
    May 13, 2026
  • Tariffs Move Leafs’ Pick from First to Sixty-Seventh
    May 6, 2026
  • Taber Arena Will No Longer Be Flooded With Schmaunt Fat After Winning Kraft Hockeyville
    April 5, 2026
  • Peters “Makes It to First Base” Giving Hope to Young Men Across Winkler
    April 4, 2026
  • Jason Kelce Spotted on Manitoba Farm in Full Mennonite Attire
    March 11, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2026 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved