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Unger Conviction

Mennonite Church’s Annual ‘Costume and Candy Party’ Eerily Similar to Halloween

October 19, 2026

STEINBACH, MB The local MBGC church invites everyone to dress up like their favourite movie character and come sit around drinking Papsi and eating candy in the church basement this evening. “We’ll be decorating everything […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonites Encouraged to Get Out and Vogt

October 18, 2026

WINKLER, MB Municipal elections are coming up and that means Mennonites across the province will heading to the polls to Vogt. “I’m hoping the Vogter turnout will be high this year,” said local vogter Dave […]

Unger Conviction

  • Eclipse Glasses Required to Safely View Sunday’s Worship Service
    August 12, 2026
  • Mennonite Church Seeks to End Drinking or Driving
    August 18, 2017
  • Grandchildren Completely Baffled by Oma’s Gesangbuch
    December 16, 2018

Unger & Thirst

  • Canadians Gorge on Turkey While Millions of Americans Starve
    October 10, 2016
  • Local Church to Host Weekly ‘Superspreader Potluck’
    October 16, 2020
  • Neufeld Downs Entire Grey Cup Filled with Komst Borscht
    December 13, 2021

Unger the Influence

  • Premier Wab Kinew Finally Visits Steinbach Just as Every Local Politician is Mysteriously Out of Town
    September 12, 2026
  • Toddler Demands Lake Ontario Be Renamed Lake Poopy Pants
    August 27, 2026
  • Trump Threatens to Rename Lake Winnipeg if Wab Kinew Doesn’t Stop Saying Mean Things About Him
    August 25, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • From Knackzoat to Plumi Moos: Five Amazing New Gifts in MCC’s Annual Christmas Giving Guide
    November 15, 2021
  • “Colorado Loewen” to Hammer Province this Week
    April 11, 2022
  • No Picture
    2025 Quiz Answers
    December 25, 2016
  • Mennonite Lingerie Now Available at Aganetha’s Secret
    January 23, 2017

Trending

  • Albertans to Vote on Whether to Vote on Whether to Vote on Whether to Vote on Separation
    October 11, 2026
  • Pentagon Introduces New “Firing Squad” Video Game for Kids
    October 10, 2026
  • FIFA Awards Donald Trump Nobel Prize for Literature
    October 8, 2026
  • Massive E-Scooter Outbreak Strikes Southern Manitoba
    October 7, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Police Arrest the Wrong Luigi
    December 12, 2024
  • Local Man Signals His Own Virtue By Calling Out Virtue Signalling
    June 11, 2020
  • Mennonite Man Violently Tossed From Airplane in Midflight
    April 15, 2017
  • Man Who Believes Any Stupid Crap He Reads Online Thinks You’re the One Who’s a Sheep
    August 8, 2021
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Alberta Separatists Hire Mennonites to Show Them How It’s Done

October 17, 2026

Incoherent White House Press Secretary Actually Speaking Low German

October 16, 2026

American School Bans ‘The Handmaid’s Tale’ For Being Canadian

October 14, 2026

White House Reinstates Day to Honour Guy Who Directed ‘Home Alone’

October 13, 2026

Mennonite Woman Arrested for Buying Her Pumpkin Pie at Costco

October 12, 2026

Unger Games

  • Connor Hellebuyck Leads League With Impressive 0.00 GAA So Far This Season
    October 5, 2026
  • Entire Population of Winnipeg Asks for Trade Out of Winnipeg
    September 24, 2026
  • Hellebuyck Demands Chance to Shit the Bed in the Playoffs for Another Team
    September 15, 2026
  • Riders Get Called For ‘Too Many Mennonites’
    September 13, 2026
  • Connor Hellebuyck Demands Trade to Blumenort Menno Knights
    September 1, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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