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Unger Games

Donald Trump Tells Iran He Holds All the Cards

May 13, 2026

WASHINGTON, DC In his most emphatic statement to date, US President Donald Trump has told Iranian authorities to give up because he holds all the Dutch Blitz cards. “I’ve got all the cards. All the […]

Unger Suspicion

90-Year-Old Grandma Emerges Victorious in Senior Assassin 2026

May 12, 2026

ALTONA, MB Mrs. Dorothy Wiebe of Altona was the last senior in town not to get sprayed with a water gun this week and has been crowned winner of Senior Assassin 2026. “I knew they […]

Unger Conviction

  • Eclipse Glasses Recommended for Sunday’s Worship Service
    August 22, 2017
  • Mennonite Seminary Student Can’t Figure Out All This German
    February 9, 2019
  • Mennonite Church Accidentally Performs First Ever Infant Baptism
    September 20, 2016

Unger & Thirst

  • Riot in Rural Manitoba After Fall Supper Runs Out of Meatballs
    September 23, 2024
  • Dill Harvest Early this Year
    July 2, 2025
  • Shocking New Photos Show Dramatic Glacier Retreat
    January 9, 2020

Unger the Influence

  • Mennonites Hired to Drain the Strait of Hormuz
    March 17, 2026
  • Conservatives Vote to Reaffirm Party Leader Mark Carney
    March 6, 2026
  • Funk and Penner Endorse Penner for Goertzen’s Job Reports Peters from Reimer
    March 1, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Mennonites Love New Game Show ‘Frintschoft Feud’
    November 19, 2023
  • Fact Check: Do Hex Signs on Pennsylvania Dutch Barns Mean the Owners are Swingers?
    May 6, 2021
  • Mennonite Couple Select the Perfect Pair of Crocs for a Night on the Town
    July 7, 2021
  • New Regulations Force Female Crokinole Players to Wear Short Skirts
    May 4, 2017

Trending

  • Man Who Aced Cognitive Test Can’t Tell Jesus From a Doctor
    May 5, 2026
  • Mennonite Man Finally Takes Off His Winter Tires
    May 4, 2026
  • James Comey Indicted Over ‘606 47’ Seashell Photo
    May 3, 2026
  • Hog Farmers Concerned as Manitoba Seeks to Ban AI
    May 2, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Entire Province of Manitoba Hikes ‘Hunt Lake Trail’ All at Once
    July 5, 2021
  • Millions of Homeless Canadian Refugees Flock to US Border After Heatwave Melts Igloos
    August 4, 2018
  • Single Snowflake Causes Vancouver Schools to Shut Down for ‘Snow Day’
    March 5, 2018
  • Toronto Couple Sells Small Empty Lot to Buy 40% Stake in the Maple Leafs
    September 23, 2022
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Mennonite Man Sets Record for Tallest Bowl at Mongo’s Grill

May 10, 2026

Nationwide Cottage Cheese Shortage Causes Mennonites to Compromise Cherished Values for First Time Ever

May 9, 2026

Webster’s Dictionary Redefines “Ceasefire” as “Active Battle”

May 8, 2026

Mennonite Man Doesn’t Have Enough Space on Census Form to List All His Kids

May 7, 2026

Tariffs Move Leafs’ Pick from First to Sixty-Seventh

May 6, 2026

Unger Games

  • Donald Trump Tells Iran He Holds All the Cards
    May 13, 2026
  • Tariffs Move Leafs’ Pick from First to Sixty-Seventh
    May 6, 2026
  • Taber Arena Will No Longer Be Flooded With Schmaunt Fat After Winning Kraft Hockeyville
    April 5, 2026
  • Peters “Makes It to First Base” Giving Hope to Young Men Across Winkler
    April 4, 2026
  • Jason Kelce Spotted on Manitoba Farm in Full Mennonite Attire
    March 11, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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