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Unger Suspicion

AI Claims It Won’t Kill All Humans and There’s Nothing to Worry About

September 27, 2026

SILICON VALLEY, CA After several disturbing reports by AI experts that claimed there was a 10% chance AI would kill us all within 10 years, new studies written by AI show that there’s actually nothing […]

Unger Suspicion

Hundreds of Legal Potash Dispensaries to Open in Saskatchewan

September 26, 2026

REGINA, SK Residents of Saskatchewan have voted overwhelmingly this week to legalize potash dispensaries across the province. “We’ve gotta do something to keep up with Belarus,” said Regina resident Barry Broesky. “I’m sure with all […]

Unger Conviction

  • Mennonite Newlyweds Look Like “They’ve Been Practicing”
    August 11, 2021
  • Introducing the All New Mennonite Enneagram!
    April 9, 2019
  • Mennonite Church Accidentally Hires Seminary Graduate
    February 11, 2018

Unger & Thirst

  • Rhubarb Sauce Discovered on Mennonite Man’s Perogies
    April 22, 2022
  • Man 3-D Prints Every Recipe in the Mennonite Treasury Cookbook
    July 31, 2018
  • Taunte Helen’s Coleslaw Declared ‘National Historic Site’
    April 4, 2019

Unger the Influence

  • Trump Calls Andrew Unger “Untalented, Totally Not Funny,” Demands Cancellation of The Unger Review
    May 31, 2026
  • Trump to “Completely Destroy” Military He “Completely Destroyed” Last Week
    May 30, 2026
  • Carney Just One MP Resignation Away From Minority Government the People Voted For
    May 29, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • “Adult Graphic Novels” Cause Stir at Local Library
    September 9, 2019
  • B.C. Relatives are Really Proud of Their Inability to Survive Harsh Manitoba Winters
    December 6, 2016
  • Winklerites Furious as Morden Woman Elected Leader
    February 3, 2022
  • Americans Furious About All-Plautdietsch Halftime Show
    February 10, 2026

Trending

  • Australian Pastor Apologizes, Says He Shouldn’t Have Preached Hourlong Sermon with Diarrhea
    September 18, 2026
  • Frugal Mennonites Excited for the Permanent Daylight Savings
    September 17, 2026
  • Carney Sends Mennonite Delegates to Negotiate with the EU
    September 16, 2026
  • Hellebuyck Demands Chance to Shit the Bed in the Playoffs for Another Team
    September 15, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Pam Bondi Offered Promising New Career in Multilevel Marketing
    April 3, 2026
  • Conservatives Run Actual Donkey in Mennonite Town, Still Confident of Victory
    October 17, 2019
  • Stash of Sears Catalogues Discovered Under Hugh Hefner’s Mattress
    October 2, 2017
  • Mennonite Olympic Dominance, as Explained By Dr. Freud
    August 19, 2016
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Entire Population of Winnipeg Asks for Trade Out of Winnipeg

September 24, 2026

Left Lane Between Steinbach and Blumenort to be Designated “Slow Minivan Lane”

September 22, 2026

Electrician Busy Explaining to Concerned Mennonites what ‘AC/DC’ Really Means

September 21, 2026

Mennonite Woman Ruins Perfectly Good Cinnamon Buns By Adding Raisins

September 20, 2026

Ed Sheeran Drops Mennonite Choir from North American Tour

September 19, 2026

Unger Games

  • Entire Population of Winnipeg Asks for Trade Out of Winnipeg
    September 24, 2026
  • Hellebuyck Demands Chance to Shit the Bed in the Playoffs for Another Team
    September 15, 2026
  • Riders Get Called For ‘Too Many Mennonites’
    September 13, 2026
  • Connor Hellebuyck Demands Trade to Blumenort Menno Knights
    September 1, 2026
  • Massive Simon Hildebrandt Statue Appears Outside MBCI
    August 16, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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