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Unger the Influence

Doug Ford to Exclusively Travel by Horse and Buggy from Now On

April 19, 2026

NEW HAMBURG, ON Days after it was discovered the Ontario Premier was getting around in a $28 million private jet, Doug Ford announced he would be getting a Martin or Eby to cart him around […]

The Daily Bonnet

Fans Petition Rock and Roll Hall of Fame to Induct Paraguayan Harpist Eduard Klassen

April 18, 2026

STRATFORD, ON Another year has come and gone and once again legendary Paraguayan harpist Eduard Klassen has been left off the list for induction into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. “It’s outrageous,” said […]

Unger Conviction

  • Grandma Loewen’s Vibrato Triggers Massive Earthquake
    May 8, 2017
  • Mennonite Church to Host UFC
    October 6, 2025
  • Mennonite Church Approves ‘Scandalous’ New Hemline
    November 15, 2018

Unger & Thirst

  • Unsure if New Church Friend’s a Teetotaler, Mennonite Woman Invites Her for ‘Coffee’
    July 22, 2018
  • Mennonite Man’s Been Using the Same McDonald’s Cup for the Past 15 Years
    March 5, 2025
  • Mennonite Man Embarks on New Career After a Weekend of Gorging on Oma’s Cooking
    April 2, 2018

Unger the Influence

  • James Talarico Article Pulled from the Unger Review
    February 19, 2026
  • White House Demands New Bridge Be Rerouted to Epstein Island
    February 11, 2026
  • George Washington Completely “Absolved” in New Epstein Files
    February 1, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Canadian Mennonites Upset as their Team, the Germans, are Eliminated from the World Cup
    December 4, 2022
  • Mennonite Woman Makes Matching Outfits for the Entire Family
    July 9, 2020
  • Mennonite Woman Introduces New Social Network Called ‘Knipschat’
    July 3, 2019
  • Lineup Outside Newly Reopened Dollar Store Stretches All the Way from Winkler to Steinbach
    February 13, 2021

Trending

  • Thousands of Poultry Farmers Accidentally Show Up at ‘National Poetry Month’ Event
    April 10, 2026
  • Killing People Only Way to Achieve Lasting Peace, Leaders Insist
    April 8, 2026
  • Mennonite Man Sent To Unclog Space Toilet
    April 7, 2026
  • Family Manages to Get On a Record Three Rides During Weeklong Trip to Disney
    April 6, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Spring Arrives in Manitoba
    March 31, 2026
  • Long-Suffering Vegas Knights Fan Finally Sees His Team Win the Cup
    April 10, 2018
  • Area Man to Corner You at the Water Cooler Tomorrow Morning and Tell You All About the Latest Joe Rogan Podcast
    October 17, 2022
  • 7 Signs Your Co-Worker was at Folk Fest this Weekend
    July 15, 2019
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Angine de Poitrine Turn Out to be a Couple Mennonite Boys from Winkler

April 15, 2026

Conservatives Form Majority Government

April 14, 2026

“I thought it was me as a trajchtmoaka,” Trump says

April 13, 2026

Mennonite Man Wears His Very Best Carhartt to Church

April 12, 2026

Americans Demand the Flooding of Saskatchewan and Manitoba to Give their Ships Easier Access to Canadian Oil

April 11, 2026

Unger Games

  • Taber Arena Will No Longer Be Flooded With Schmaunt Fat After Winning Kraft Hockeyville
    April 5, 2026
  • Peters “Makes It to First Base” Giving Hope to Young Men Across Winkler
    April 4, 2026
  • Jason Kelce Spotted on Manitoba Farm in Full Mennonite Attire
    March 11, 2026
  • American Victory Part of Chinese Government Plot to Get Canadians to Quit Playing Hockey
    February 26, 2026
  • Trump to Award Connor Helleybuyck Nation’s Highest Honour: The Undisputed Champion of Beautiful Clean Coal
    February 25, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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