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Unger Suspicion

Winnipeg Man Absolutely Exhausted Due to Lack of Time Change

November 3, 2026

WINNIPEG, MB Area plumber Dave Warkentin woke up really tired this morning due to the lack of time change. “Ugh, it’s that time of year again where we don’t change the clocks,” said Warkentin. “I […]

The Daily Bonnet

Winkler to Set Clocks One Hour Ahead of Morden

November 1, 2026

WINKLER, MB When the Province announced that Manitobans would no longer be participating in the time change, the City of Winkler pounced on the opportunity to distinguish itself from neighbouring Morden. “We’re establishing a Winkler […]

Unger Conviction

  • Local Bible School Offers Degree in Inspirational Meme Creation
    July 22, 2020
  • Commuter Sets Record for Consecutive Days Dining Alone in Bible College Cafeteria
    February 1, 2024
  • Fight Breaks Out Between Winkler’s Top Two Fäasenjas 
    December 14, 2018

Unger & Thirst

  • Fraser Valley Man Dunks Donut, Sparks Massive Theological Debate
    September 11, 2016
  • Mennonite Man’s Been Using the Same McDonald’s Cup for the Past 15 Years
    March 5, 2025
  • Wild Night Ensues After Mennonite Woman Spikes Schoofly Pie
    March 23, 2018

Unger the Influence

  • Albertans to Vote on Whether to Vote on Whether to Vote on Whether to Vote on Separation
    October 11, 2026
  • Pentagon Introduces New “Firing Squad” Video Game for Kids
    October 10, 2026
  • British Columbians Can’t Decide Which Mennonite to Vote For
    October 6, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Mennonite Man Severely Injures Knipsing Finger
    May 17, 2020
  • Mennonite Karen Accidentally Wears Mask Up Over Her Nose
    July 16, 2021
  • Mennonite Woman Begins Each Morning with Devotions and the Daily Bonnet
    May 17, 2018
  • Lonely Planet Releases 600-page Guide to Blumenort
    October 19, 2016

Trending

  • Mennonite Beats Mennonite with Votes from Mennonites
    October 25, 2026
  • Winnipeg Mayoral Candidate Accidentally Uses Pictures of Winkler
    October 23, 2026
  • Edmonton Mennonites Big Fans of Mayor Knack-Zoat
    October 22, 2026
  • Roundup Introduces New Product to Eliminate Election Signs in Your Yard
    October 21, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Taylor Swift Announces Massive Countrywide Tour of Toronto
    August 3, 2023
  • Fred Penner’s Cat Fails to Return
    March 24, 2017
  • Fred Penner and Al Simmons to Square Off in World Heavyweight Title
    July 14, 2019
  • Credit Union Accidentally Gives Loan to Englishers
    October 14, 2017
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Winnipeg Couple Dress as Country’s Scariest Creature: Canada Geese

October 31, 2026

Mennonite Couple Make Sure to Eat at Home Before Jets Game

October 30, 2026

City’s Top Chef Mortified to Discover His ‘Charcuterie Board’ is Just Glorified Faspa

October 29, 2026

Person Under 70 Shocks Community By Voting

October 28, 2026

Elizabeth Holmes Takes On Trajchtmoaka Job in Winkler

October 26, 2026

Unger Games

  • Mennonite Couple Make Sure to Eat at Home Before Jets Game
    October 30, 2026
  • Connor Hellebuyck Leads League With Impressive 0.00 GAA So Far This Season
    October 5, 2026
  • Entire Population of Winnipeg Asks for Trade Out of Winnipeg
    September 24, 2026
  • Hellebuyck Demands Chance to Shit the Bed in the Playoffs for Another Team
    September 15, 2026
  • Riders Get Called For ‘Too Many Mennonites’
    September 13, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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