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Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Forgets to Put Star Anise in Her Chicken Soup

August 11, 2026

ALTONA, MB Mrs. Toews was so thoroughly embarrassed with her failure to add star anise to her chicken soup at the soup and pie fundraiser this past week that she has vowed never to make […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Buys Back All the Albums He Was Forced to Burn in the 70s

August 10, 2026

SWIFT CURRENT, SK It’s taken him more than four decades, but local music fan Steve Goosen has finally re-purchased all the albums he tossed on the bonfire at that fateful youth retreat back in 1979. […]

Unger Conviction

  • Only Two More Weeks Until Mennonites Have to Go Back to Church
    August 17, 2024
  • Mennonite Man “Crosses the Floor” to Join the Lutherans
    November 7, 2025
  • Grandma Plett Discovers Bible iPhone App, Disrupts Service
    August 26, 2020

Unger & Thirst

  • Lord Blesses Mennonites with Massive Farmer Sausage Smoke Shack
    June 9, 2023
  • Thieves Steal ‘Mennonite Crown Jewels’ in Brazen Daytime Heist
    October 20, 2025
  • Mennonite Daredevil to Consume Pickles and Milk Together
    October 28, 2018

Unger the Influence

  • Trump Really Excited About New $1.8 Billion Slush Fund
    May 20, 2026
  • Webster’s Dictionary Redefines “Ceasefire” as “Active Battle”
    May 8, 2026
  • Man Who Aced Cognitive Test Can’t Tell Jesus From a Doctor
    May 5, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Man Consoles Himself With Gospel Music as Team Loses
    November 27, 2016
  • Mennonite Woman Awarded Top Prize in Annual Southern Manitoba Flower Festival
    May 30, 2019
  • Manitoba Hires Mennonite Quilting Ladies to Patch Provincial Highways
    May 14, 2022
  • Left Lane Between Steinbach and Blumenort to be Designated “Slow Minivan Lane”
    December 9, 2018

Trending

  • 8 Women Show Up to Claim Prize After Mary Unrau’s Name Called in Raffle Draw
    August 2, 2026
  • Jeff Bridges, John Goodman Reunite for ‘The Big Sawatzky’
    August 1, 2026
  • Mr. Penner Flicks For Triple Word Score
    July 31, 2026
  • Chihuahua Airport Offers New Lounge Just For Mennonite Grandmas
    July 30, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Alberta Man Deported for Failing to Drive an F150
    August 4, 2021
  • Mennonites Excited for New Tolkien Prequel
    December 11, 2018
  • Knels and Annie Krahn Make Their Oscar Picks
    February 26, 2017
  • Winnipeg Couple Divorce After Conflict Over Air Conditioner Temperature
    July 22, 2024
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Reitmans Introduces New ‘Angine de Poitrine’ Line

August 9, 2026

Mennonites Fill Copper Wire Shortage By Stretching Pennies

August 8, 2026

Steinbach Unveils New Public Transit System

August 5, 2026

Mennonite Grandma Punishes Grandkids By Making Them Chew Thrills Gum

August 4, 2026

Rhubarb Discovered on Mennonite Woman’s Vereniki

August 3, 2026

Unger Games

  • Mennonite Soccer Fans Devastated as England “Fe’schluckes” Yet Again
    July 15, 2026
  • White Sox to Feature All-Mennonite Starting Lineup
    July 11, 2026
  • Soccer Player Gets Red Card for Yawning
    July 10, 2026
  • FIFA Agrees to Let Trump Officiate Tonight’s World Cup Match
    July 6, 2026
  • Canada Loses to Morocco After Not Getting Enough Pucks to the Net
    July 5, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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