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Unger & Thirst

King Charles: “White House Dinner Not as Delicious as the Vereniki I Had in Steinbach Back in 1970”

April 30, 2026

WASHINGTON, DC King Charles III was treated to a gourmet state dinner at the White House this week, but the monarch said it failed in comparison to the most memorable meal of his life. “I […]

The Daily Bonnet

Cuauhtémoc Selected as 2026 World Cup Host City

April 29, 2026

CUAUHTEMOC, CHIHUAHUA, MEXICO The 2026 World Cup host cities have been announced and surprisingly ever single one of them is located in a place that’ll be real convenient for Mennonite audiences. Among the choices are […]

Unger Conviction

  • Mennonite Man Excited to Take Flight in Neighbour’s Flying Car
    March 28, 2024
  • Mennonite Woman Excommunicated for Leaking ‘Game of Thrones’ Spoilers
    April 13, 2019
  • Mennonite Pastor Asks for Standing Desk, Told He Already Has One
    April 30, 2018

Unger & Thirst

  • World’s Longest Farmer Sausage Stretches from Blumenort to Steinbach
    September 10, 2017
  • Mennonite Man Excommunicated After Washing Grandma’s Cast-Iron Skillet
    September 8, 2020
  • Canadian Mennonite Dares to Try the Hot Sauce from Mexican Import Store
    July 19, 2023

Unger the Influence

  • James Talarico Article Pulled from the Unger Review
    February 19, 2026
  • White House Demands New Bridge Be Rerouted to Epstein Island
    February 11, 2026
  • George Washington Completely “Absolved” in New Epstein Files
    February 1, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Mennonite Man Wagers His Sod Hut on Today’s Football Game
    September 4, 2016
  • Extended Family Gathering Relegated to Well Outside the Christmas Week
    January 3, 2020
  • Hippies Mistake Steinbach’s Summer Festival for Woodstock
    June 18, 2017
  • Mennonite Stunt Driver Performs Ten U-Turns in a Row
    October 12, 2019

Trending

  • City of Steinbach Issues ‘Boil Schmaunt Fat’ Advisory
    April 21, 2026
  • Server Stops By to Ask if Everything’s Tasting Good So Far Just as Area Man Takes Final Bite
    April 20, 2026
  • Doug Ford to Exclusively Travel by Horse and Buggy from Now On
    April 19, 2026
  • Fans Petition Rock and Roll Hall of Fame to Induct Paraguayan Harpist Eduard Klassen
    April 18, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • World Health Organization Bans Reading Internet Comments
    August 24, 2019
  • Mennonite Woman Watches ‘Black Panther’, Can’t Figure Out Which One Is Peter Sellers
    June 8, 2018
  • U.S. Capitol to Be Replaced with One Massive Banana Republic
    January 7, 2021
  • Inspired by Ukrainians, Mennonites Demand Their Own Christmas
    January 7, 2017
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Mennonite Man Takes Home Top Prize at Annual ‘Humility Awards’

April 27, 2026

Mennonite Town Implements Needle Exchange Program for Knitting-Addicted Grandmas

April 25, 2026

Morden Man Sets Up Corn Stand Early This Year

April 24, 2026

Mr. Hamm to Return to Ancestral Name of Mr. Schinkjefleisch

April 23, 2026

Mr. Harms Promises He Won’t Hurt Anybody

April 22, 2026

Unger Games

  • Taber Arena Will No Longer Be Flooded With Schmaunt Fat After Winning Kraft Hockeyville
    April 5, 2026
  • Peters “Makes It to First Base” Giving Hope to Young Men Across Winkler
    April 4, 2026
  • Jason Kelce Spotted on Manitoba Farm in Full Mennonite Attire
    March 11, 2026
  • American Victory Part of Chinese Government Plot to Get Canadians to Quit Playing Hockey
    February 26, 2026
  • Trump to Award Connor Helleybuyck Nation’s Highest Honour: The Undisputed Champion of Beautiful Clean Coal
    February 25, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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