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The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Couple Honour Dad by Making Him Come Over and Fix Stuff

June 21, 2026

TABER, AB A young Mennonite couple invited Dad over this Sunday afternoon to fix the leaking tap and a couple other things that were wrong with the house. “Happy Father’s Day, Dad,” said Samantha Penner. […]

Unger Games

Recently Retired Jonathan Toews Scrambles to Get His Name on the Fernwood Waiting List

June 20, 2026

STEINBACH, MB Days after announcing his retirement from hockey, Winnipeg Jets superstar Jonathan Toews made sure to get his name on the waiting list at Fernwood Place in Steinbach. “You can’t leave it until the […]

Unger Conviction

  • Mennonite Church Issues Memo Against Signing Garrett Marino
    September 10, 2022
  • Church Singles Group Disbanded After Three Decades Without Success
    April 25, 2017
  • AGM Scheduled to Coincide with Most Important Game of the Season
    February 23, 2023

Unger & Thirst

  • Steinbachers ‘Super Excited’ to Finally Have Some Sort of Prohibition Once Again
    October 25, 2018
  • Thieves Steal ‘Mennonite Crown Jewels’ in Brazen Daytime Heist
    October 20, 2025
  • Mennonite Woman Has So Much Extra Rhubarb She Just Doesn’t Know What to Do with it All
    July 1, 2020

Unger the Influence

  • Man Who Aced Cognitive Test Can’t Tell Jesus From a Doctor
    May 5, 2026
  • James Comey Indicted Over ‘606 47’ Seashell Photo
    May 3, 2026
  • Hog Farmers Concerned as Manitoba Seeks to Ban AI
    May 2, 2026

The Daily Bonnet

  • Mennonite Man Finds Money Mysteriously Left Behind on Restaurant Table
    August 17, 2016
  • Friesen-Friesen Wedding is Well-Attended by Local Friesens
    September 8, 2016
  • Ten Person Maximum Puts Mennonite Families in Quite the Predicament
    March 28, 2020
  • Mennonites Gather for Harder-Dyck Wedding
    November 8, 2024

Trending

  • Conflict-Averse Mennonites Getting Really Into Soccer to Watch All the Ties
    June 12, 2026
  • Every Self-Respecting Mennonite Cheering for Paraguay in World Cup Opener Friday
    June 11, 2026
  • Ottawa to Ban Social Media for Kids and Replace it with Hinterland Who’s Who
    June 10, 2026
  • Mennonite Man Super Excited to Eat These Noah’s Ark Cookies
    June 9, 2026

Unger Suspicion

  • Mrs. Reimer to Star in New Remake: “The Bible School Graduate”
    June 26, 2019
  • King Charles Unveils Stunning New Portrait
    May 15, 2024
  • Christiano Ronaldo Signs $200 Million Deal with Hanover Kickers
    December 31, 2022
  • Manitoba Health Data to Be Reported Using Flannelgraph Boards
    March 31, 2022
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Canadians Celebrate as List of ‘Sports We Don’t Suck At’ Balloons to Two

June 18, 2026

Trump Vows to Make Washington Reflecting Pool as Beautiful as Lake Winnipeg

June 17, 2026

Alberta Man Votes to Stay in Canada After Discovering Honey Dill Sauce

June 15, 2026

Musk Tries Desperately to Squeeze Camel Through Eye of This Needle

June 14, 2026

Mennonite Man with Million-dollar Tractor Stakes a Stand Against “Pride”

June 13, 2026

Unger Games

  • Recently Retired Jonathan Toews Scrambles to Get His Name on the Fernwood Waiting List
    June 20, 2026
  • Canadians Celebrate as List of ‘Sports We Don’t Suck At’ Balloons to Two
    June 18, 2026
  • Conflict-Averse Mennonites Getting Really Into Soccer to Watch All the Ties
    June 12, 2026
  • Every Self-Respecting Mennonite Cheering for Paraguay in World Cup Opener Friday
    June 11, 2026
  • Mennonite Church to Host UFC Fight
    June 7, 2026

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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