Mennonite Woman Invents New Sport, ‘Dill Pickleball’

STEINBACH, MB

Not content to play regular pickleball like the Englishers, area woman Ruth Loeppky is hoping a little dill and a lot of love will revolutionize recreation options in southern Manitoba.

“Mennonites consume more pickles than anyone else is the country,” said Loeppky. “But one thing we will not tolerate is these bread and butter pickles the Englishers like to toss our way.”

Going forward, athletes will be expected to consume a jar of dills and a shot of pickle juice before each match.

“Plus you have to stand the entire time in the kitchen,” said Loeppky. “Though, of course, from now on we’re calling it the cellar.”

Starting this spring, Loeppky plans to dismantle the centre court at the Pat Porter Centre in Steinbach and plant a garden full of dillweed.

“Plus all our matches will take place during faspa,” said Loeppky. “And the winner gets to take a nice long meddachschlop in the back room where we keep the paddles.”

(photo credit: theturquoisetable/CC) 

Abbotsford Man Mortgages House to Pay for Bruce Springsteen Tickets
Mennonite Man Accused of Flipping Off the Pastor