ATLANTA, GA
Days after being fired from his job on the long-running sitcom The Simpsons, Apu Nahasaspeemapetilton has been hired by Fox News to work as a political pundit.
“We only hire cartoon characters around here,” said Fox News. “Plus we’re not nearly as concerned about cultural appropriation as the main Fox network obviously is.”
Apu, who has worked for almost thirty years at a Springfield-area convenience store will add a voice of reason to the otherwise insipid and ill-informed commentary on the network.
“As a cartoon character, he’s the realest, most sincere person we’ve got on this network,” said the spokesperson. “We considered Groundskeeper Willie for a while, but it was decided he was too calm and even-keeled for our network.”
Fox News says they’re very happy to continue to represent the perpectives of conservative white Americans and this trend will not end with the hiring of Apu. He will continue to be voiced by a white actor. Rumours suggest Bill O’Reilly is being considered for the role.
