CORN, OK
Mr. Billy Pauls of Corn, Oklahoma recently posted his “extensively researched and definitive proof” of his flat earth theory which contained a lengthy Works Cited page containing dozens of memes he found online somewhere.
“Round earthers, or sheeple, as I like to call them, are ignorant and it’s only a matter of time before they’ll see the truth that the earth is flat!” exclaimed Pauls. “If you don’t believe me, have a look at these memes!”
Since Pauls incessantly posts his inane and annoying theories online every day, he no longer has any Facebook followers left, but that didn’t stop him from believing his recent post was really accomplishing quite a lot.
“Your silence is deafening!” exclaimed Pauls. “No comments, eh? Well, I can see there’s no resistance to my theory and I’ll just assume you’re all on my side now. How about let’s all celebrate the universal truth of the flat earth theory with a lovely voyage to Antarctica. Careful not to fall off the edge!”
Although Pauls is quite confident in his flat earth nutbarism, he has not yet gathered up enough confidence to move out of his mother’s basement.
