WASHINGTON, DC In one of his last moves in office, outgoing President Joe Biden has imposed a 25% tariff on Jordan Peterson who has recently been imported into the US from Canada. “We’ve got an […]
SEATTLE, WA Starting this week, Amazon will be offering a new option to have your package delivered at least two weeks late. “Or more,” said CEO Jeff Bezos. “It’s always been our goal to deliver […]
OTTAWA, ON Canada’s leading right wing intellectual Jordan Peterson will be heading south this week in exchange for Noam Chomsky. “They were eager to get rid of Chomsky, and we could do without Peterson,” said […]
ROSTHERN, SK Derek Wiens, 42, was helping clean up his Oma’s apartment building this week when he stumbled upon an entire freezer packed to the brim with frozen treats. “It’s like she was reaching across […]
ALTOONA, PA A nationwide manhunt has ended in the arrest of a tall handsome moustachioed plumber named Luigi. “I’m innocent, I tell you, innocent,” yelled Luigi as he was taken into custody by Altoona police/koopa […]
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