BUTLER, PA
After being informed on the situation at the rally in Pennsylvania, President Joe Biden took to the stage to express his sympathy for “former President Ronald Reagan.”
“I’ve been briefed on the situation,” said Biden. “And my wife Tipper and I are praying that the Gipper turns out just fine.”
Biden is also hoping that Vice President George H.W. Bush can soldier on in Reagan’s place while the President is indisposed.
“I hear his injuries are minor,” said Biden, “which is good to hear. We may disagree on policy, but I think everyone agrees that violence has no place in American politics. This is the 1980s after all.”
Biden was apparently in an important international meeting when he heard about the attempt on Reagan’s life.
“It was either Helmut Schmidt or Lech Walesa or something,” said Biden. “I don’t know. Doesn’t matter. I’m just glad to hear that President Reagan is safe.”
Biden plans to take a break from campaigning for a few days while he waits for his rival Mikhail Gorbachev to recover.
