ABBOTSFORD, BC
Residents of Sumas, Washington were completely baffled by the huge display of fireworks over the border in Abbotsford, BC this evening.
“What are they doing? Practicing?” pondered Mrs. Schmidt of Sumas. “They had sparklers, flares, roman candles, the whole works. All this fuss and it’s only the 1st of July.”
Schmidt has written a letter to her local representative demanding that the Canadians “keep it down a little.”
“Hold your horses!” said Schmidt. “I think we can all wait a couple days to celebrate our great and glorious nation together.”
Schmidt says if things don’t quiet down over in Abbotsford she’s planning to set off cherry bombs every evening for the rest of summer.
“We’ll see how they like it,” said Schmidt.
Abbotsford residents were apparently complete undisturbed by Schmidt’s threat, saying that they were used to loud annoying noises coming from south of the border anyway.
