After being ordered by United States Congress to inform users about the data being collected on them, ‘The Mrs. Martens Files’ reveal the following information that she’s collected about you:
- your favourite television show: The Bachelorette
- your most searched phrase on Google: How to seduce a Mennonite man.
- your favourite grandparent: Grandma Unrauh
- towns you’ve visited in the last year: Neubergthal, Altona, Blumenort South, Gretna, Gretna, Altona, Neubergthal, Vankla, Morden, Gretna, Rosetown, Vanapag, Altona, Grand Forks, Gretna
- your annual tithe to the Reinland EMC church: $1153.72
- your preferred time to visit Chicken Chef: 7:18 AM on Thursdays
- your most frequent Google Images search: Hot Mennonite women without their bonnets
- your favourite Bible verse: 2 Corinthians 12:20: “For I am afraid that when I come I may not find you as I want you to be, and you may not find me as you want me to be. I fear that there may be discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, slander, gossip, arrogance and disorder.”
- your favourite Armin Wiebe book: Murder in Gutenthal
- your favourite musical artist: Engelbert Humperdinck
- most visited website: www.ungerreview.com
- how much money you spent on eBay last month: $783.15 (and all of it on quilting patterns)
- which of your grandchildren are living in sin: Colin, Melissa, Samantha, and Deitrich
- how you voted in the last election: Conservative, though you do find Justin Trudeau pretty dreamy
- how much time you spend online: six and a half hours a day
- how much time you spend on devotions: six and a half minutes a day
- how often you go to aquacise: oba, not as often as you should
- your most frequently used Plaudietsch swear word: Dietschlaunt!
- your favourite Johnny Cash song: 25 Minutes to Go.
- the last time you had meddachschlop with Henry: May 3, 1991.
