“I Could Make it Myself Better and Cheaper”: Mennonite Woman Refuses to Buy Anything at Church Bake Sale

GRUNTHAL, MB

While examining the offerings at the Grunthal Church fundraising bake sale this week, Mrs. Kehler refused to buy a single item, claiming that everything she saw she “could easily make at home much better and much much cheaper yet!”

“Three dollars for a six-pack of molasses cookies. Oba nay,” exlaimed Mrs. Kehler. “Or how about this banana loaf over here? Mine is far moister and cheaper too!”

Mrs. Kehler continued on like this before her daughter Alice reminded her that this whole thing was a fundraiser.

“Of course you can make it for cheaper, Mom,” explained Alice. “They’re trying to generate some money here!”

Mrs. Kehler was offended at the suggestion.

“Not on my watch, they’re not!” she said. “Ach, these raisin buns over here! How many raisins did Mrs. Friesen even put in these things. Looks like she’s been skimping. And, oh, look at that, Mrs. Wiebe is trying to sell her doilies. First of all, doesn’t she know this is a bake sale! And secondly, everyone knows Mrs. Wiebe’s doilies are inferior to mine! Her stitching is all wrong. All wrong!”

Eventually Mrs. Kehler had to be escorted out of the building as she was starting to deter other customers.

“It’s all over-priced crap!” yelled Mrs. Kehler, as people entered the church. “Don’t be fooled! If you want good schnetke, you’ve got to come to the Kehler residence!”

Bake sale co-ordinator Mrs. Froese says she had begged Mrs. Kehler to contribute her baked good to the sale, but Mrs. Kehler had refused saying that she didn’t have the time to bake these days and would much prefer to complain about others.

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