TOKYO, JAPAN
The lechers in charge of the International Olympic Committee are requiring all athletes, regardless of gender or sport, to wear one of those Borat mankinis or else face massive fines.
“You wear what we tell you to wear or else you’re out!” said IOC chair and Mennonite church elder Jake Harms. “As a Mennonite elder, I’m used to telling folks what they can wear, so it’s only natural that they put me in charge of this whole thing.”
The new Borat mankinis will be introduced starting tomorrow and athletes are already looking forward to the change.
“At least it’s consistent,” said German Olympian Helmut Fischer. “It’s going to make the rugby sevens competition a lot more interesting, let me tell you.”
The IOC is also hoping that the new Borat mankinis will provide a boost in the dismal television ratings.
“If only they had these mankinis during the last few Apollo missions,” said Harms. “I think we’re finally going to get a few people to watch dressage.”
Harms says he feels a great sense of power in telling other people what to wear and hopes that all the folks back home in Gruenhimmeldorf will follow suit.
(photo credit: Greger von Guggelhielm/CC)