WINNIPEG, MB
The entire City of Winnipeg breathed a collective sigh of relief last night as the Toronto Maple Leafs lost in overtime to the Boston Bruins.
“Yikes, that was a close one,” said Winnipeger Dick Froese. “It sure softens the blow of the Jets’ poor performance.”
The game was such an unexpected blessing that thousands of Jets fans gathered on Donald Street to celebrate the loss.
“I’m a Mennonite, not a Buddhist,” said Froese, “but sometimes I agree that existence is suffering. I’m glad all those Leafs fans get to share that with us.”
While Leafs fans bemoan the fact they haven’t won the Cup in almost 60 years, Jets fans point out that they haven’t ever won it at all.
“Unless you mean the Avco Cup,” said Froese. “But we won’t talk about what happened after that …”
Winnipegers are now hoping that somehow the Oilers and Canucks both lose so that the suffering can be evenly spread across the country.