SEATTLE, WA
Legendary Nirvana frontman Kurt Cobain would be fifty years old today, which is exactly the same age as your Uncle Peter who works at the local chicken hatchery.
“I always thought of Uncle Pete as an old man, even though he’s my Mom’s youngest brother,” explained local Nirvana fan Dylan Broesky, 28, of the Rosthern area. “I never would have guessed he’s exactly the same age as Kurt Cobain.”
Broesky and his friends tend to correlate youthfulness with hipness, and were shocked to discover that many of their musical heroes were old enough to order from the Smitty’s ‘Lighter Appetites’ menu.
“Oh, my gosh, Johnny Rotten of the Sex Pistols is nearly as old as my Grandpa Reimer,” said a shocked Dylan Broesky. “Madonna and Morrissey are approaching 60 as well.”
Broesky says he’s going to have to rethink his definition of coolness and acknowledge the fact that even “badass rock stars” age.
“This information is shattering my concept of both hipness and age,” said Broesky. “I’ve never asked him because I always assumed he was old and out-of-touch, but maybe my Uncle Pete secretly rocks out to ‘Smells Like Teen Spirit.'”
Upon hearing that his nephew would be impressed with him if he was a Nirvana listener, Uncle Pete discarded all his Hank Williams records and downloaded Nevermind and In Utero onto his recently-purchased iPod.
