CALGARY, AB
Local man Sam Goertzen, 41, “graduated with honours” from PragerU this week after successfully binge-watching more than four-hundred hours worth of conservative political videos and posting almost all of them to his social media feed.
“I’m not sure how it happened,” says Goertzen, “but after three months straight of watching videos on why the electoral college is actually a good thing and why organic food is not worth the cost, I got a diploma in the mail.”
Goertzen is reportedly the first individual to “finish PragerU” which comes just a year after he finished NetFlix.
“I must say, it’s quite the honour to be the first ever graduate of such a prestigious institution,” said Goertzen. “I’m certain that I have triggered more leftists with my social media posts than anyone else before me.”
After watching his first couple dozen videos, Goertzen transformed from a nominal progressive who attended a GC church into a megachurch-attending red pilled conservative.
“And it’s all thanks to Will Witt and a bit of common sense,” said Goertzen. “Now that I’ve watched every PragerU video, I’m going to spend the rest of my days holed up in my Mom’s basement watching that dreamy Ben Shapiro.”
After completing his “undergraduate studies” at PragerU, Goertzen intends to enroll in a graduate program at the University of Phoenix or “wherever it was that Kent Hovind got his PhD.”
