SCHRATJLIJCH, TX
The Schratjlijch Gospel Church is inviting everyone to stay after church this Sunday for a delicious potluck, including roast beef, mashed potatoes, and a delectable array of Jell-o salads and measles.
“You’re not going to want to miss this potluck, let me tell you,” said Pastor Dave. “This is definitely going to be one church event you’ll remember for weeks to come.”
Folks at Schratjlijch Gospel are already eager to sign up for the potluck.
“I’m bringing buns, potato salad, and seven or eight unvaccinated children,” said one local mom. “I know my Timmy and Susie, in particular, are really looking forward to sharing their uncovered coughs and sneezes with the entire congregation.”
Pastor Dave says events like this are just one more thing that make going to church worthwhile.
“At Schratjlijch, we’re spreading ignorance from the pulpit and measles at the potluck,” said Pastor Dave. “I’m not sure which is better, but we’ve truly got a little something for everyone.”
Rumour has it the event may also feature a guest appearance by Health secretary RFK Jr.
(photo credit: Phil Denton/CC)
