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TORONTO, ON
After a court ruling found the company guilty of bread price-fixing, Loblaws CEO Galen Weston cited the words of Jesus in defence of the company’s actions.
“Man does not live by bread alone,” said Weston. “Neither do women for that matter. You also need President’s Choice mango chunks and PC Nashville Breaded Chicken Bites … on sale today!”
The court decision will cost Loblaws $500 million or about two week’s-salary for Galen Weston.
“As I said, you can’t live on bread alone,” said Weston. “You also need cold hard cash.”
This is not the first time Weston has quoted a noted historic figure in defence of his actions.
“I’ve got ‘let them eat cake,’ written above my headboard,” said Weston. “It’s basically our corporate motto.”
The Jesus quote had theologians scrambling to reach out to the CEO and clarify things, but Weston said he didn’t have time for Bible lessons as he was much too busy inflating prices on an exciting array of new grocery items.
(photo credit: JasonParis/CC)