CALGARY, AB
Area man Pat Dyck has had a strong distrust of billionaires for quite some time now. According to his frequent Facebook posts, billionaires are always up to no good, cannot be trusted, and are only ever looking after their own interests.
“I’m a naturally skeptical guy,” said Dyck. “I don’t trust billionaires at all, so obviously what we need is a couple billionaires in here to solve this problem.”
Dyck says that, in particular, he doesn’t trust Big Pharma, Big Real Estate, or Big Anything, so it’s really going to take some Big Tech, Big Oil, and Big Wall Street to get things done.
“They might look benevolent, but really those rich folks are so shady, always trying to screw over us little guys,” said Dyck. “This is why I have complete faith and devotion to the newest benevolent billionaire who says he isn’t trying to screw us over.”
Dyck is very impressed with the billionaires who are going to bring down the other billionaires.
“The billionaires will finally get things right this time,” said Dyck. “I sure love our new billionaire overlords, so very different from our last billionaire overlords.”
