STEINBACH, MB
Legendary musician and notorious veggie-lover Paul McCartney has decided to cancel his upcoming summer concert in Steinbach, citing what he calls “an embarrassing lack of vegetarian options.”
“That town is full of Mennonites and they consume more meat than any other people on the planet,” said McCartney. “I’m sorry, but I’m just going to have to take my Hofner bass and play elsewhere, like say Brandon or Thompson.”
Last minute efforts to change McCartney’s mind proved to be fruitless.
“I even offered him some tasty meatless cabbage borscht,” said Steinbach mayor Chris Goertzen, “but he simply would not be convinced.”
The concert was supposed to be the largest in the history of rural Manitoba since the notorious Niverville Pop Festival of 1970.
“It’s really too bad McCartney’s going to be a no-show,” said Goertzen. “Oh, well, we’ve always got the Jake Brakes.”
(photo credit: by spablab /CC)