‘Mennonite’ and 7 Other Terms You Didn’t Know were Slurs

I’m not sure why it took the outside world so long to figure this out, but the word Mennonite is actually a highly offensive slur and should never be used. After all, like Anabaptist, the word Mennonite was not a term we self-applied, but was given to us by others with inferior soup recipes who preferred to baptize their children at a much younger age. We, who followed Menno Simons, however, were called Mennonites. So, yes, it’s always been a slur. Not sure why you didn’t know this. So, to avoid further offence and hockey suspensions, here are several other slurs you should avoid at all costs.

  • Russlander – This is the slur used by the Mennonites who came a bit earlier to refer to their cousins who came a bit later.
  • Butter churner – This is the duty given to young people with few other talents, so if you call someone a “butter churner” you’re saying they can’t do the really important job like milking or manure spreading.
  • Englisher – This slur can be applied to anyone who either a) speaks English b) isn’t a Mennonite or c) lives in the city.
  • Kjnipser – This refers to the little pieces we shoot in a game of kjnipsbrat. When applied to a person, it can imply they’re a nuisance or pest and don’t ever shoot a 20.
  • Knackzoater – Someone who eats way too many sunflower seeds and amasses such a sizeable pile that Uncle Jakob has to haul it away with the backhoe.
  • Gravel pitter – Someone who hangs out at the gravel pits. Can also be combined with knackzoater to become a “knackzoating gravel pitter” or worse a “knackzoating gravel pitting Russlander.”
  • Jantsieder – These are the people who live on the wrong side of the Red River. They may be our relatives, but they’ll never admit it.

 

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