STAMFORD, CT
In most cases, Mennonite couples are encouraged to work out their differences in private, or perhaps in front of a small group of elders. However, this past week, local farmers Henry and Annie Miller of Lancaster, Pennsylvania became the first Mennonites ever to appear on the wild and crazy Jerry Springer Show.
Springer first spoke with Mrs. Miller, in a long dress and kerchief, who complained at length about her husband Henry.
“He spends more time with the cows than he does with me,” said Mrs. Miller. “I’ve had it up to here with his shenanigans. He comes home from the barn at the ungodly hour of seven or eight pm and then demands that I feed him and rub his feet. But I have needs, too!”
Later in the show, after he had been suitably liquored up backstage, bare-footed Henry arrived to confront his wife.
“I’ve squeezed more utters than you can ever imagine,” said Mr. Miller. “When I come back into the house, I expect at least a smile or some kind words, but all I get is a heaping plate of sausage and a Bible reading!”
As the episode progressed things became heated. With audience members egging her on, Mrs. Miller stood to her feet and tossed a chair at Mr. Miller. The audience erupted in chants of “Jerry, Jerry, Jerry!” before Mr. Miller ripped his shirt off and stormed off the set.
“The Mennonite episode was one of the wildest we’ve ever had,” said Springer after the show. “I’m glad that I’m able to draw these emotions out of people. I hope to have more Mennonites on in the future. They can get really violent when you prod them a little. It makes for some great television.”
An episode featuring Mr. and Mrs. Peter F. Reimer of Morden is also in the works.
(photo credit: by justinhoch/CC)
