SCHRATJLIJCH, MB
Plans are already in the works for a delightfully illegal Easter this year. The Hiebert family of Schratjlijch, Manitoba, for example, have been dutifully shopping, cooking, and otherwise preparing for their first illegal gathering of the season.
“Grandma Hiebert is planning her lovely illegal holiday spread like usual,” said Mrs. Hiebert. “We’ve got illegal paska, illegal cheese curds, illegal ham, even some illegal dill pickles.”
The Hieberts plan to sit at a comfortably illegal distance of two feet apart from one another and plan to obliterate the public gathering laws with a tantalizingly illegal gathering of thirty-six Hieberts.
“It’s so wonderful to gather together and turn all the grandkids into criminals,” said Grandma Hiebert. “Ahhh, it feels so good to illegally gather as a family.”
The Hieberts are hoping the lockdown lasts at least until fall, so they can have their second annual illegal Hiebert Thanksgiving.