ALTONA, MB
After years of searching genealogy websites and poring through family history books, local man Peter Nikkel of Altona, has learned that he and his wife Anne are distantly related. Upon discovering the news, Peter immediately asked his wife Anne for a divorce.
“Finally! I always knew we were fifth cousins,” said Peter. “Well, I guess we’ll have to do the honourable thing and split up this fifty-three year marriage.”
Anne immediately agreed to the divorce, saying she could always sense there was something amiss with Peter.
“His love-making was always a little reserved,” said Anne. “I would expect that kind of hesitancy from a close relative. Now it all makes sense!”
Peter and Anne broke the news to their five children and twenty grandchildren at a family gathering last week.
“Well, kids, your mother and I have some sad news,” said Peter. “We found a common ancestor from back in the Prussia days and that means it’s all over between us!”
The Nikkel children will undergo rigorous scientific testing in the new few weeks to make sure they’re all “okay” despite having such closely related parents.
(photo credit: Anne Worner/CC)