ALTONA, MB
Despite protests from her husband who just didn’t understand, area woman Erin Stobbe drove nearly an hour from her inferior local thrift store to go to the “good one” in Altona.
“Oba, my Harry thought we could just stop at the local store,” chuckled Stobbe. “That man knows absolutely nothing about thrifting, let me tell you.”
Stobbe is among a select group of Mennonite women who are privy to what they affectionately call “the list.”
“It’s a ranking of every thrift store in the province, from worst … to Altona,” said Stobbe. “We send spies to visit each thrift store on a regular basis to make sure our ratings our up-to-date. Any slippage in the quality and quantity of second-hard organs or freshly-rinsed ice cream pails and you’re going to see a drop in the rankings.”
While Stobbe won’t reveal the full rankings to the public, she says basically every Mennonite woman already knows where the good thrift stores are anyway.
“Word gets out,” said Stobbe. “When it comes to thrifting, there’s simply no room for compromise.”
Stobbe ranks each store based on quality of products, the ability of cashiers to quickly count large quantities of spare change, and the strength of that unmistakable thrift store “musk” as she calls it.
“Plus we test out all the furniture,” said Stobbe. “I even get my Harold to meddachschlop on the chesterfields and if he’s still sleeping by the time I’m done checking for any offensive material amongst the used books, then we’re good to go.”
Stobbe and her compatriots plans to release their annual Thrift Store Awards this week right after the Oscars.
(photo credit: USAG-Humphreys/CC)