CHILLIWACK, BC
A fight broke out during an Epp gathering in the church basement this week after Grandma Epp insisted on singing the wrong version of ‘Away in a Manger.’
“Diewel, that woman. She just has to sing the wrong melody every time now doesn’t she!” exclaimed daughter Lois. “Why can’t we all just agree to sing it the right way!”
Lois claims that the “right way” of singing ‘Away in a Manger’ makes it easier on the kids, but others in the family see it differently.
“I can’t believe what she’s teaching her children! She’s just been suckered by the mainstream media’s version of ‘Away in a Manger,'” says Cousin Wanda. “The Epps have always sung the better version of ‘Away in a Manger’ and there’s no reason to change that now!”
As the song began, Grandma Epp started with the wrong version, but Lois belted out the correct version and soon a few kids were on her side.
“I’d say it was about fifty-fifty,” said Peter, an innocent bystander. “I tried to stay neutral. I’ve seen what can happen when you sing the wrong ‘Away in a Manger.'”
After increasing her volume to try to drown out the people who were singing it the other way, Grandma Epp stormed out of the room, dragging her supporters with her.
“We’re having our own gathering in the nursery room,” said Grandma Epp. “Those who want to sing properly can join me.”
Grandma Epp managed to convince most of the Epps to join her gathering after taking all the halva with her.