GOSHEN, IN
The Third Mennonite Church of Goshen has had a burned-out lightbulb for more than three months, all due to the fact that members could not agree on how and when and who should change the bulb.
“So we formed a committee,” said Lightbulb Change Committee chair Doris Yoder. “We’re planning to reconvene in spring to hopefully come to a consensus on the matter.”
While the church awaits the committee’s decision, several other bulbs have also gone out.
“And the toilet paper in the men’s room needs replacing,” said Yoder. “We’re going to form a committee to look into that matter as well.”
Things have gotten so bad at Third Mennonite, that folks can’t even walk down the aisle without pumping into things.
“And the coffee time in the foyer is getting out of control,” said Yoder. “This burned out lightbulb is an accident waiting to happen.”
While it’s long been said that even when it comes to lightbulbs, Mennonites do not change, it seems that no one knew the reason until now.
“It’s not that we’re resistant to change … or that we prefer to be in the dark or something,” said Yoder. “It’s just that it sometimes takes the committee quite a while to come to a decision.”
The fine folks at Third Mennonite are hoping the Lightbulb Changing Committee will get their act together in time for the annual Valentine’s Day dinner or else they’ll have to host it in the barn again like they did last year.
“And we all know how that turned out,” said Yoder. “All I can tell you is we’re discussing the matter.”
The church is also forming a separate committee to get bulb in the overhead projector changed and another one to clean up that pile of dirty dishes in the kitchen.