Unger Suspicion
Twitter Hires the Amish to Shun Trump
SAN FRANCISCO, CA Social media giant Twitter has hired a bunch of Amish to do what only Amish (and maybe a few Mennonites) can do: shun Trump. “We haven’t done a shunning in a while, […]
amish
Unger Suspicion
Google Searches for “How to Become Amish” Surge During Presidential Debate
HOLMES COUNTY, OH Aghast at the dismal prospects for life in mainstream American society, millions of Americans are apparently considering joining the Amish. “During the debate we saw a huge surge in ‘how to move […]
The Daily Bonnet
Trump Appoints Faceless Amish Doll to Fill Vacant Supreme Court Spot
WASHINGTON, DC It seems the vacant Supreme Court spot has been filled much quicker than expected, as Trump and his Republican majority Senate rushed to approve the only nominee they knew they would have no […]
Unger Suspicion
‘Amish Village at Night’ as Seen from International Space Station
INTERCOURSE, PA The International Space Station has just posted stunning new photographs of a small Pennsylvania Amish village. “It’s amazing all the detail you can see from that distance,” said space station director Yuri Baranov. […]
The Daily Bonnet
Mennonite Couple to Replace Harry and Meghan at Buckingham Palace
LONDON, UK After Harry and Meghan decided to call it quits on the royal family, a generous family of Mennonites from Holmes County have agreed to take their place at Buckingham Palace. “As Anabaptists, we’re […]