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The Daily Bonnet

Wife Frustrated With Husband’s Inability to Take a Flattering Selfie

March 21, 2017 Andrew

ALTONA, MB Area woman Erin Peters, 31, became completely fed up this past weekend with her husband Bob’s complete inability to take an attractive selfie. “That man is totally inept when it comes to taking […]

The Daily Bonnet

Five Common Misconceptions About Mennonites

March 9, 2017 Andrew

To outsiders, Mennonites may seem like a perplexing group with peculiar customs. This unfamiliarity has caused a number of misconceptions about Mennonites. The Daily Bonnet is here to correct some of these errors. Misconception: Mennonites […]

Unger Suspicion

Mennonite Woman Consults ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ for Wardrobe Advice

February 15, 2017 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Local senior, Helen Stoesz, was shocked by the misleading content of the popular book Fifty Shades of Grey, which she purchased used at the local MCC store hoping for advice on how to update her […]

The Daily Bonnet

Body Odour to be Bottled and Sold as ‘Eau de Menno’ Cologne

February 12, 2017 Andrew

KITCHENER, ON The body odour of dozens of hard-working Mennonite men has been extracted using a special process and been used to create a brand new cologne, which will be marketed and sold as Eau […]

The Daily Bonnet

Single Uncle Elmer Refuses to Date Women Who Wear Pants

February 11, 2017 Andrew

NEWTON, KS Uncle Elmer Jansen, 71, has been single his whole life for a variety of reasons, not the least of which is his absolute refusal to date women who wear pants or “Satan’s slacks” […]

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