BIRD-IN-HAND, PA The small Mennonite town of Bird-in-Hand, Pennsylvania has become the first community in the nation to introduce a knitting needle exchange program for local grandmas. Starting this January, local knitters will be able […]
SILVER SPRING, MD After rigorous testing in a secret facility somewhere near Harrisonburg, Virginia, the United States Food and Drug Administration has approved the sale of a controversial new pharmaceutical product called ‘Mennonite Viagra.’ The […]
EMERSON, MB Local woman, Mrs. Schultz, 81, of the Altona area was arrested on charges of narcotic smuggling after she left a Tupperware container of her famous poppyseed cake in the back seat of her […]
SCHISSJAT, ON The Mennonite Mafia is looking forward to a busy summer of drug-running this year and are already accepting applications for wide variety of fedeenstlijch positions. “You can drop off your resume and cover letter with […]
ALTONA, MB Altona residents were ecstatic this week after a federal court struck down a ban on the medicinal use of dill weed that had been in place since the late 1960s. “There are so many recipes in the […]
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