TORONTO, ON Yes, Canada has it’s own Thanksgiving holiday and, thanks to an earlier harvest, it comes a full six weeks before the American celebration. This means that gluttons across Canada can fill their bellies […]
YARROW, BC Exhibiting the most extreme manifestation of the “Protestant work ethic,” local butcher Helmut Siemens of Yarrow spent every waking moment making farmer sausage this Labour Day. “I don’t take a day off unless it’s the […]
WASHINGTON, DC Outgoing President Obama took time out of his schedule on his last Independence Day as President to admit that everything his detractors and conspiracy nuts have ever said about him is completely and […]
OTTAWA, ON Patriotic Canadians across the country will gather today to celebrate a really long time of not being the United States of America. “Canadians are a completely distinct culture. We have, like, slightly different […]
GRUNTHAL, MB Ecstatic monarchists across the Southeast region are lining the streets in anticipation of Queen Victoria’s visit. Her Majesty, now nearly 200, is rumoured to arrive in Manitoba early Monday morning and will make stops […]
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