MOUNTAIN LAKE, MN Brave Mrs. Allison Koop, 41, decided to toss away the paper candle-wax guard during tonight’s Christmas Eve service. Koop is widely regarded as the toughest woman in Mountain Lake for her ability […]
LEAMINGTON, ON Anabaptist families across North America are going to be glued to their TV sets tonight for the annual airing of the holiday classic ‘Grumpy Old Mennonites.’ The film stars Walter Neufeld and Jack […]
CUAUHTEMOC, MEXICO After his cousins Pieta and Johan extolled the virtues of a snowy white Christmas, Guillermo Krahn of Cuauhtemoc decided to purchase a snowmobile and have it shipped down to Mexico in anticipation of […]
WASHINGTON, DC In his greatest act of selflessness and humility since taking the Oval Office, President Donald Trump pardoned a delicious Hutterite-raised turkey today. Trump will now have to dine on inferior store-bought turkeys this […]
LEAMINGTON, ON Local man Billy Fehr has decided to quit his job at the Leamington ketchup factory to pursue his lifelong dream of becoming a professional sumo wrestler. Fehr said he made his decision after […]
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