HARRISONBURG, VA
After opening up their hymnals for the first time in several years, parishioners at the Central Harrisonburg Mennonite Church were mortified to discover that they’d totally changed nearly every single word in the classic hymn 606.
“Ugh, I’m getting sick of this cancel culture,” said Mr. Hershberger. “Why does everything have to change?”
Instead of Praise God from Whom All Blessing Flow, attendees were now asked to utter Guide Me O Thou Great Jehovah.
“There’s not a single line that’s the same,” said Mr. Hershberger. “My Anne tells me that the notes are not even the same, either!”
Congregants were so outraged that they decided to be really passive aggressive towards the new hymnal.
“The hymnal will not be invited to the potluck after the service,” said Mr. Hershberger. “And I’ll barely give it a smile or a nod of the head in the grocery aisle.”
A few attendees said they didn’t mind the new lyrics and were just glad the hymn didn’t get replaced with Kendrick Lamar’s “Not Like Us.”
