MONTEZUMA, GA
Former US President Donald Trump has been indicted this week on 606 charges of tampering with the Vogts.
“I didn’t even know there were any Vogts in Georgia,” said Bishop Yoder of Third Montezuma Mennonite Church. “We have some Weavers and Millers and heck of a lot of Yoders, but I’ve never heard of a Vogt around these parts.”
This lack of Vogts, it seems, is exactly the problem, as Trump has been accused of finding Vogts where there simply are none.
“He was bringing in Vogts by the truckload,” said local political pundit Chad Schwartzendruber. “Every day there were Vogts showing up in town. At one point, there were so many Vogts on N. Dolby Street that we didn’t know what to do with them all.”
It’s not known how many Vogts Trump brought into the State of Georgia, but investigators estimate it may be upwards of 10,000.
“Which really had an impact on the Vogt population in other cities,” said Schwartzendruber. “Quite frankly, I think it’s time the Vogts packed up their things are returned to Seminole, Texas.”
Trump denies the allegations saying he’d never even tamper with a Voth or Wall let alone a Vogt.