VANCOUVER, BC
As blistering temperatures rock the West Coast, Vancouverites are desperate to find a plausible explanation for this abnormal heat wave. It seems like they’ve finally discovered the source.
“The hot air is believed to have originated in the Fraser Valley somewhere and is being blown in our direction by a bunch of Friesens,” said Vancouver resident Anne Thiessen. “I’m just hoping those Abby Mennos will’ve expelled all their air in a couple days, because it’s scorching out there.”
With temperatures reaching close to 40 degrees, Vancouverites are stripping off their clothes even more than usual.
“I’m usually wearing shorts and flip flops as soon as it hits 15,” said Thiessen. “With all this hot air from Abbotsford blowing in, I’m not sure I have any more garments left to remove.”
Abbotsfordians, however, say they are not to blame and that the hot air is actually coming from Victoria.
“Probably somewhere on Belleville Street,” said Mrs. Friesen, “which is where the hot air in BC always originates.”