PITTSBURGH, PA
It may have been temporarily paused for now, but this week the White House announced a 87% reciprocal tariff on all penguins, including hockey superstar Sydney Crosby.
“Yeah, well I guess this is what happens when you use ChatGPT to crunch the numbers,” said press secretary Karoline Leavitt. “Hey, there’s nothing we can do. It’s out of control.”
The tariff on Crosby, however, is no mistake.
“Last month we were going after Canadians,” said Leavitt. “It’s only naturally we’d move on to penguins. In this case, it’s a twofer.”
Some have defended the Sydney Crosby tariff, saying his net worth is actually higher than some of the countries they’re tariffing.
